There Were Times When I Wished You Were Dead - Chapter 18
Translator and Editor: Effe and Nabi
Not knowing how to persuade this poor kid, Lilian spins around and sinks into her thoughts.
Looking at his resigned look, it seemed that he was going to die without saying a word if he is killed right now.
After long contemplation, Lilian decided to use the most effective persuasion method she knew.
Lilian hit Kal’s head as hard as she could. It made a loud noise.
There is no more convincing method than violence.
“You said you wanted to get revenge, didn’t you? Then do something about it, other than sitting there and die. Are you a fool?”
“What do you know.”
She hit him one more time.
“If you die, wouldn’t it be good for that person? If you live, you can do back and do something, idiot.”
Though he was pretending to be fine, anger burned in Kal’s eyes from Lilian’s words. He may have been upset about being beaten. However, Lilian hit him again with a strong force.
“Go back. Go back and see for it yourself. See who made that decision and make them regret it.”
“What do you know? If I go back, it would be hell there. I would just die again.”
Should I hit him again?
“And you won’t here? I’m asking you one last time. Are you going to die here, or are you going to do something?”
Lilian shook her head, looking down at Kal, who wasn’t answering. But as soon as Lilian turned away, a hasty voice sprang out behind her.
“I’ll go. I’ll go!”
Lilian turned around, and her smile returned as well. It was a relief. She couldn’t hit that pretty face anymore.
“I told you not to laugh!”
“Again, another argument.”
“…Are you going to come too? My house… It’s spacious. There’s a physician too, so you and your mother can live together.”
“My house is here, and how can I take my sick mother there? Where is your house? Are you going to bring a carriage or something?”
“See. Just take care of yourself first.”
Seeing Kal looking visibly sullen, Lilian added.
“I’ll help you run away.”
“This debt… I will definitely pay it off.”
“That’s fine, and the brooch was enough.”
Lilian smiled wide. Lilian laughed as she saw Kal’s red ears again.
Yeah, I shouldn’t let such a pretty boy die like that. The sound of the rain hitting the ceiling blended with the sound of Lillian’s laughter.
The rain poured down much harder than people expected. Everyone said it was the first time they saw such heavy rain.
Lilian regretted for a moment for attaching the flumen stone on the roof for no reason.
This amount of rain seems to be enough to sweep down the house, or even the entire village, without the flumen stone.
She came home with a bunch of sparsio stones, but she was still worried. Aunt Mariel offered to stay with her mother in exchange for the sparsio stone, but her little anxiety remained.
“Hey. Let’s not talk about leaving, aren’t we dying here too?
Kal asked with a suspicious face as the rain was pouring in.
Lilian put flumen stones all over the lair while the thugs were busy checking the other places in this mess.
Or maybe Kal doesn’t care because he’s getting killed anyway.
“You can’t be killed like that.”
Lilian mumbled, attaching the sparsio stone to her body and Kal’s body. Then, she released Kal.
His body was released after two weeks. It was awkward for him to freely move his limbs because it felt quite unfamiliar.
Suddenly, a tremendous sound was heard, and one of the ceilings above Lilian collapsed. Lilian closed her eyes and wrapped her arms over her head, but she didn’t feel any pain.
As she opened her eyes slightly with a puzzled look, she saw Kal covering her.
[ T/N: A-ha!! Remember this scene? ]
“Hey, are you crazy?!”
It was quite crazy to think that he got hit by a collapsed ceiling instead of her. She was reminded of how he was yelling at Lilian to run away when they first met.
A weak groan flowed out from Kal’s mouth, as his back was hit directly.
“Why did you do that?”
“Oh, I just did it because there was a person in front of me. You are also crazy for trying to save me as well.”
When Lilian said a gentle thank you, Kal bit his lips.
Lilian felt that it was time for them to get out of here. Soon, the place would collapse, and the thugs would come.
“Let’s go. We have to go out now.”
Karloi eagerly and firmly held Lilian’s hand as if it was his only rope.
“…Your hands are so warm.”
She could hear Kal muttering alone from behind, but Lilian was focused on getting out.
No one has seen her coming here today, so she won’t be doubted. Lilian opened the back door carefully and dragged Kal out.
“Do you know where to go?”
“You’re asking something obvious. This is my area.”
“But why are you saving me?”
Lilian put strength to his hand she touched. It was awkward and strange to feel the touch of his hand.
In fact, it was Lilian who wanted to ask Kal why he ‘kept saving.’
He was worried and told her to run away, gave her a brooch to save Denise, and protected her from a collapsing ceiling.
“It’s just because they are people. That’s why I did it.”
She could hear Kal laughing from behind her back. Since Kal does not laugh very often, such laughter was very rare.
The quiet voice was strangely good to hear.
Lilian felt her ears were getting hot for some reason.
Outside, it rained so badly that she couldn’t see ahead. If went the wrong way, he might be swept away.
Lilian swallowed her saliva and grabbed Kal, leading him.
Rain poured heavily.
Lilian Lou did not like rain. The name Lou was derived from the rain, but Lilian Lou didn’t like it. In fact, she hated it.
However, since she met Kal, Lilian would look outside on rainy days. It was the same when she entered the Duchy and lived as Yvonne Delois.
So, the time she was with Kal was the only time Lilian Lou could be Lilian Lou.
Not Denise’s daughter Lou, not the hard-working Lou, but just a twelve-year-old Lilian Lou who talks to a child of her age.
Lilian never forgot the time she spent with the boy who left, who promised to do many things and do more.
Because Kal was the only good deed Lilian Lou ever did in her life. The only thing she was proud of in her own life. Which was beautiful and shining.
On rainy days, she used to think of it, the short periods of time when she could laugh and talk without anyone noticing.
Now, it became Yvonne’s habit, so her body would follow the rain even if she could no longer recall the past.
“It’s raining a lot today, so it’s difficult to take a walk. Everyone is just going crazy because even the radish got damaged.”
Mary Ann said carefully to Yvonne as she got ready to go for a walk as usual.
“It’s all right.”
“It’s not alright. The Imperial Palace is a little…”
It was not unreasonable for Mary Ann to stop her.
Purdue Palace, Croisen’s first Imperial Palace, was famous across the continent for its grandeur and splendor. Since ‘Purdue’ meant gold in the ancient language, so it was deserving of its name.
However, the structure was not sturdy since it was focused on splendor, and buildings became weaker as they suffered frequent wars from the past.
On a rainy day like this, she could know better.
“The garden is okay.
“You think the garden is not in Croisen, and it doesn’t rain? Why do you like the garden so much, every day…”
Nevertheless, the only thing Purdue Palace still boasts was the Palace’s gardens.
In the huge garden divided into one hundred-seventy-two zones, you could see all kinds of plants. Despite the war, the garden was the only part that retained its beauty.
“We don’t have to go to the outdoor garden.”
Yvonne did not give up and persuaded Mary Ann.
Yvonne used to see the garden when she was walking. It was on rainy days.
It’s not like she likes flowers. Denise was the one who liked flowers. Since she was in a bad situation, she didn’t like it, though Denise liked and always wanted to collect flowers.
To Yvonne, flowers were a kind of deed. Beautifully blooming flowers showed what she had gained in return for listening to the Duke.
Unlike when she was Lilian Lou, Yvonne Delois and Denise were in a position to relax and enjoy the flowers.
In addition, flowers constantly imprinted the existence of Denise to Yvonne as to not forget that her mother is still in the hands of the Duke.
Again, the flowers are not… no, let’s not think about it.
Mary Anne looked at Yvonne’s increasingly complicated expression and bowed her head as if she had lost.
“…Okay. Then, I’ll take you to Entuarum.”
The indoor garden, called the Entuarum, was one of the most spectacular gardens in the Purdue Palace.
It was the pride of Purtu, even the envoys and royal families from all over the world wanted to see.
Even though Karloi left it, she heard that it was because he hated the garden, but Yvonne thought it was unexpected. Kal, whom she knew when she was young, liked flowers very much.
Yvonne sat silently when she reached the indoor garden through the deafening sound of the rain on her ears.
Unsure what Yvonne was thinking, Mary Anne simply assumed Yvonne was disturbed by the Queen’s coronation ceremony and the Duke’s visit.
It was because she did not know what conversation Yvonne had with the Duke.
“…Can I go outside for a while?”
A strange request popped out of her mouth, which happened a while later. Mary Ann gazed at the turbulent outside for a moment and shook her head. No, she’s not going to allow it.
“I’ll just be at the door. I’ll be there for a minute. I’m feeling a little stuffy.”
For Mary Anne, Yvonne’s requests were also orders, so she had no power to refuse.
Yvonne couldn’t do anything she would like to do, and even this much, she had to ask her lady-in-waiting.
As Mary Anne did not answer, Yvonne slowly stepped out to see if she could. As she breathed in the wind outside, she finally was able to breathe comfortably.
Yvonne often thought that if she died, she would probably die of suffocation since it had been hard for her to breathe.
Luckily, the screen was large and wide, which provided adequate protection from the rain.
The raindrops falling on her palm through the screen were cold. Yvonne recalled a conversation with the Duke as she stared at the water droplets falling down.
Yvonne briefly responded to the Duke, who was raging about why she was arranging the Queen’s ceremony.
< You can poison the Queen then. >
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